Finally

Home again, home again.
Jiggity jig.

Seriously?! 12 days of the East Coast tour and the last 5 days with no internet access was just too much.

Literally just walked it the door.

Full report tomorrow.

Merry Merry

Merry Christmas from Clemsongirl, Coach and the Minis!

Are We Having Fun Yet?

Still in VA, solo with the children as Coach perfects (!) his abs at the gym for 84,000 hours. Took the laptop to Panera, amen for free WiFi whilst they play Leapsters.

The minis and I saw Tale of Despereaux last night, it was medium. Admittedly, I love going to the movies, but perhaps not to see that movie. The boys liked it and we only spilled a $9.50 bucket of popcorn twice. Nice use of non-existent funds. Damn.

I did finish a book last night that I must recommend. There's a (Slight) Chance I May Be Going to Hell. It was a gift from Hair Girl and I laughed through the entire thing. I dreamt about entering a beauty contest after falling asleep last night and woke up still giggling over the funnier chapters. Highly Recommend.

OK, the minis are OVER sitting here whilst I check email, etc.

We're leaving for PA tomorrow morning, then back to VA on Friday. It's the East Coast Tour 2008, remember.

Greys

Yesterday we stopped at Macaroni Grill for lunch with some old friends of Coach's and their 3 children in North Carolina. I gorged myself on Seafood Penne and Diet Whateversontap.

Then we got in the monogrammed minivan and headed North 5 hours to Richmond. Upon arrival at Coach's parents, I excused myself to the powder room to freshen up (aka apply Cherry Bomb lip gloss and brush the hair) and saw, gasp! 4 grey hairs.

I removed them immediately.

Coincidence? Me thinketh notsomuch.

Breakfast

I hate breakfast. Always have. Something about consuming meat and sticky syrup within an hour of arising from my much needed beauty rest just is all too much.

However, there is something so intimate about breakfast that makes it just perfect.

Over the last 2 weeks, I have been lovingly prepared breakfast by several friends, and it is an indicator of friendship level I am certain.

Two Friday nights in a row, the minis and I slept at Lawyer's Wife's house on the tail end of one celebration or another. In the morning, Lawyer made pancakes and sausage and bacon and it was just lovely. Sitting and standing around the table in her kitchen in our pajamas and chatting and laughing about the night before. Too fun.

Friday morning Ashlie invited me and the other fabulous PTA board member (we're the ones that DIDN'T quit...because we're not lame...but I digress) over for breakfast after drop off. I showed up with wet hair and sporting a Clemson sweatshirt from the early 90s. I looked rough. The cranberry stuffed French Toast and the ice cold Dr. Pepper? Amazing. The company? Even yummier.

This morning, I awoke at Skinny's (of the infamous BFF triad of Clemsongirl, Skinny and FishyBusyness) house in Charlotte. (OK, I may have slept in until 8:45ish and risen to already fed and playing (5!) children, stop judging.) Her hubs of 84,000 years made us eggs and pancakes and bacon and coffee. As we sat and ate and read the paper and talked, I realized something.

It's not really about the food. It's about the friends.

Mine are the best. Pinky swear.

TGIF

Headed to Ryan's holiday party at school, then the 4(!) of us are going North. The monogrammed minivan is packed for the East Coast Tour, stop #1 at Skinny's house in Charlotte. Can't wait!

Don't worry though, traveling with 2 minis and Coach always lends itself to some serious blogging material.


And BTW? I am vaccuming myself out the door.

I'm just saying.

Just Minding My Beeswax

You know how you're just going about your day...la la la...and them BAM!

Someone tells you that you suck?

Well, maybe not straight out TELLS you, but generally informs you in not so many words?

Yeah, that's my day.

My current Facebook status?
Clemsongirl didn't know she sucked so much. Glad someone told her.

Ahem

This morning Coach left at 7:10am to take the minis to school and I straightened the family room. Then I pounded a Diet Whateversonsale. Then I came upstairs and made 2 beds (Ryan had already made his...cute boy)! Then I had another Diet Whateversonsale. (Don't judge. We've all got issues. Just keep smiling and nodding and reading. Thank you very much.)

Then I vacuumed the entire upstairs. Done at 7:30am.

This can be interpreted in one of 2 ways. They may or may not both be true-ish.

1. She is a fantastical vacuumer and has it down to a science powered by caffeine.
2. She has a very, very small upstairs.

Roy G. Biv

I'm mostly packed for our trip on Friday, also known as the East Coast Tour of 2008.

I've packed no fewer than 5 puffy vests (orang-y, chocolate, royal blue, silver and hot pink). I've also packed 4 fleece scarves (hot pink, lime, black and red), 2 sweaters (hot pink stripes and green), 6 pair of gloves (varying combos of stripes) a pair of Chestnut brown Uggs and a wool pea coat (ocean-y teal fabulousness).

Great White North...here I come.

Random Ramblings

This is totally non-sequitur, but hey, I warned you. (I think I have been spelling sequitur wrong for several years...still not convinced.)

Stopping at Starbucks on your way to meet someone at another Starbucks is not wrong. Or is it? I mean the meeting Starbucks is like 20 minutes away with traffic. Clearly I needed a (free) Espresso Truffle to get me there, yes? Plus, when you admit you have a problem, that's like half of solving it. I'm just saying.

*****

When you go through a drive-thru (another nice spelling), which I don't usually since you never get the right order, your total in Atlanta may be Six FITTY Fo'. If you ordered the same thing elsewhere, your total would be "Six Fifty Four." It's English people. Embrace it. Learn it. Love it. Your health department rating was 100%. Your grammar and pronunciation rating? 49%. Law of averages...you still kind of suck.

*****

WalMart has enormous tins of black licorice Scottie dogs (most delish treat ev-ah) for $7.96. That is a ridiculous price. If you buy them with me, you can convince the checkout girl that they should be $2.50 and she will indeed price override them for you. Seriously? $7.96 is too much. Sam Walton would agree, pinky swear.

*****

You can't possibly imagine my excitement over the fact that the minis are getting HUGE boxes of Nerds in their stockings. Nerds are the one candy they are never, ever allowed to eat. They are teeny tiny and get every damn place. Tell me you don't believe in Santa when that movie-theater size box of candy contraband ends up in your stocking. Yeah, baby.

*****

Lawyer's Wife deserves a medal. She listened to me talk non-stop tonight for about 2 hours about absolutely nothing. She nodded and laughed and "uh-huhed" in all the right places. I'm certain I gave her a headache.

*****

I may or may not have acquired several rolls of sage damask wallpaper today that I may or may not be using in my half bath. I don't know how to hang wallpaper, but I am fairly certain I can figure it out. I mean really? When we lived in Tennessee I switched out the plumbing fixtures in the powder room with a book and a baby in a Snugli. Pretty sure I can master wallpaper...famous last words, right?!

non se·qui·tur
Pronunciation: \ˈnän-ˈse-kwə-tər
Function: noun
Etymology: Latin, it does not follow
Date: 1540

1: an inference that does not follow from the premises ; specifically : a fallacy resulting from a simple conversion of a universal affirmative proposition or from the transposition of a condition and its consequent
2: a statement (as a response) that does not follow logically from or is not clearly related to anything previously said

Wrap Up

T-3 days until vaca.

What's left on your list?

He's the One

He came home at 5pm tonight. With the brown sugar I needed to bake.

He took the children on a bike ride whilst I napped and made a sad excuse for cookies.

Then he made them dinner and put them to bed.

Holy crap. He rocks.

Coach...

...is finally home after 2 extended weekend trips. Don't misunderstand me. That boy needs to leave every once in a while so we can stay married (underfoot is not a good place to be with Clemsongirl), but I was really struggling these past 2 weeks! The migraine is leaving the building, but left a nice little hangover from the meds and a lingering ache behind my eyes. I have had them for-evah, and usually they are pretty manageable. About 3 times a year though, forget it. I am down for the count.

Yesterday I went to meet a potential new (super cute!) seller and she and her hubs probably think I am insane. I was all over the place trying to ignore my pounding head! Her house is so dang perfect though! It reminded me of how fabulous a house can be without 2 small boys running through it!

Coach is relatively less busy this week than usual, so I am looking forward to doing some things together that we only get to do in December...like have a meal before 9pm...go to the grocery store...and have him pick up the minis after school with me. It's really the little things that I want...plus maybe a bottle of Burberry Brit and Lacoste Touch of Pink...I'm just saying.

Shopping is done, with the exception of Coach's dad. The minis are finished, although I am sure I will pick up a few last minute things. They do need more drawing paper and construction paper, but that's about it.

Friday after school, we're headed to Charlotte to see Skinny and her family. It's perhaps the ideal place for is to spend the night. She is a sleep Nazi like me, and all 5!! of our boys will be asleep by 7:30. She makes cookies, which I eat for breakfast. It's win-win. hee hee

Saturday we head to Richmond. Wednesday we drive to Pennsylvania. Then we do the entire thing in reverse order after Christmas. It's absolutely insane. Amen for Leapsters. When we return, I am expecting a visit from Fishy Busyness and her family. So fun!

While we're gout of town that week, a few of our Northern friends are headed South. Our house is a hotel for them along the way. They stop here, the let themselves in via the garage keypad and they sleep here. They head out in the morning and viola! Free and cozy hotel. I love that! I just wish we could be here to see all of them!

What's your story this week?

Morning, Sunshine

It's Sunday. I *think* I am starting to feel better.

Off to Mass.

Still Standing

The migraine is still here, despite more meds from my Doc and 84,000 tricks and trials to make it go away.

However, I think I know what will officially give it the boot.

A few more real estate referrals.

hee hee hee

It's Not a Tumor

(you're supposed to say that like Arnold S. in Kindergarten Cop)

However, I am rocking the start of a migraine so bad that it feels like a it. If past performance is an indicator, I predict vomiting very, very soon.

Seriously the meds cocktail that Skinny and I designed (with medical-type Doctors, prescriptions and stuff) isn't touching it and Coach is out of town.

This. Is. Not. Good.

I repeat.

Not. Good.

Saved by the Trash Man

I finished the toy closets in the playroom, etc just in time for garbage pickup. I may or may not have bribed him with Diet Pepsi (duh, it was on sale at Target) to come back after he rounded the cul-de-sac for a second round of trash. Indeed I had that much to chuck out. Admittedly I have a box to drop off at Goodwill remaining, but mission otherwise accomplished.

Tangentially, Coach had an office $5 gift exchange this week. We decided on popcorn and the red/white striped popcorn buckets from the dollar spot at Target. I wrapped it all up super cute and then stuck the whole fandango in a green gift bag. The bag had red and silver polka dots on it and I added tissue and another juicy bow on the handle.

As he was walking out to his car with the bag on Tuesday morning (sporting khaki pants, a University hoodie and New Balance trainers) he shook his head. He said, "Yeah. No one's going to make fun of me for THIS wrap job."

Oy vey. Boys just don't understand. At least he's in Houston this week/weekend so I can put more bows and monograms on stuff while he's gone. hee hee hee

Not. Kidding.

Purge Baby Purge

Not that kind of purge...we'll get skinny another time.

But I will be purging the playroom and minis' closets on Thursday. Must start the new year with some space to put newly acquired toys and books. I spent most of the day straightening and ironing today, so Thursday is purge city.

Inevitably the Hungry Hippo game loses all it's marbles and the Buckaroo no longer "bucks". Jack has outgrown the baby books and the pile of schoolwork from this semester is ready to be filed. OK, put in this year's "under the bed Rubbermaid", but put away none the less. Got to start with a fresh slate in 09, right?

As soon as the minis get taken to school by Coach tomorrow (oh how I love the Fall semester), I am down to business. Just you wait.

Oh, and by the way? This Pomegranate Chip ice cream will not make your bank statement actually better, but it will cause you to ignore that crappy low balance, for at least 30 minutes. Especially if you eat it at 10:20am. I'm just saying.

41!

Today is Coach's 41st birthday!

And I thought he was an "old man" when we met and he was 29...and I was 21.

Sheesh.

Hit List

Edited again on Wed morning... :)

Checking in at 3:01 pm, almost done...

Today I am going to:

wash and dry my hair
go to my office for some housekeeping
stop by Victoria's Secret for some free lip gloss via a coupon * got 2!!! love love love
go to Toys R Expensive and pick up 2 last things for the minis...not sure what they are though!
meet up with Lawyer's Wife for a coffee (we've downgraded to freebies and talls...damn economy) (** and convinced her to come to pizza night for Jack's school!)
find 90 red clear plastic sparkly plates...PTA **Party City...tacky but well stocked!
go to the bank...deposits ONLY...amen
drop off a bag o'stuff at Ryan's school
drop off another bag o' stuff at Jack's school
make my to do list before we head out of town next Friday
get stamps at the post office and mail my 84,000 Christmas cards

That seems like enough before 2pm, yes?

Sheesh.

I Just Know It

One of you has a real estate referral for me.

I can just feel it.

At least one of you knows someone who is moving to or from the Atlanta area or the Atlanta suburbs. Or someone moving up or down in house here. Or has a house listed that is just not selling.

You know you like me. You know I am super fun. You know I have the ability to squeeze the life out of a nickel. (Just ask Coach)

Give a girl a break, ok? Send me an email at clemsongirlandthecoach@yahoo.com. I pinky swear it'll be the best real estate experience ever! I also pinky swear that I am a real live Realtor with the brokerage that sells the most homes in the entire world. Our logo may or may not be a red, white and blue hot air ballooon...I'm just saying.

Did you know that FHA loans are available to everyone, not just first time home buyers or low income buyers? Did you know that they require only 3.5% down payment? It's true. In some areas no down payment.

Did you know that sellers here traditionally pay some or all of your closing costs? Lenders are lending money and I can help you with that also. Did you know that as a buyer you don't pay me a single dime?

So call up that girlfriend of yours who is renting or whatever and tell them to consider buying. It's the old "buy low, sell high" plan. Houses are basically free in Atlanta right now. Not really, but it sure feels like it!

Also? If you have a Real Estate Agent that's not getting the job done, you CAN get out of that contract early.

I'll even spring for the Starbucks.

Do we have a deal? I thought so.

He Knows

My 7 year old knows.

About Santa.

And no one told him. He said he was thinking about it at night in his bed and decided that the "whole thing is ludicrous" and "even with the time change in France and stuff, it makes no sense."

After a lengthy discussion, I determined that no one told him that, and that he's just fine with it. When I told him I believed in Santa, he said, "You're Santa. You believe in yourself. That's a good thing." Um, yeah. He also said "It's not anything I want to talk about anymore." Um, sure Dr. Phil.

OMG. He's not even upset. Just matter of fact and very, very clear that he knows.

Damn. They grow up too fast. Jack on the other hand says, "My brother is talking crwazy talk. He is wying about that. I know Santa is a real person. He is so stupid." Well, at least the 5 year old is on board.

The fact that he used the word "ludicrous" correctly is how I know he is smarter than I am.

Weirdo

I am such a weirdo.

I just did the equivalent of an adult "Ding Dong Ditch".

I drove to my swap partner's house.

I put the box on the porch and knocked on the door.

Then I booked it to my monogrammed minivan and drove away.

I was in my pajamas and a puffy vest. It was not pretty.

But the box is super cute!

All Yours

As promised...your questions answered...most of them anyway!

Yes, I got my swap box. It freaking ROCKS! I took some photos this morning and will share this weekend. I was waiting on one item for her package which arrived yesterday...I hope she likes it!

Magic Pants! Seriously, you will not be disappointed. Not in stores, only online. Order a size smaller than you think. They are long as all get out, but you can let them drag a little. I wear them everyday with flip flops and ballet flats. Trust me.

VS lip gloss. I am digging the Big Carmapple. It is the same color as Oatstanding which they no longer carry. They are all really sheer, although they look dark in the tubes. I also love Cherry Bomb, Cherry Baby, Juiced Berry and Twisted Citrus (basically clear).

Children's toys. Well, the minis are 5 and 7 so of course Legos are a big deal in the Casa de Chaos. Ryan is a book lover and Jack is a fan of all things construction and building. Also? The child loves office supplies. Seriously? He asked for (and received) an electric pencil sharpener and a new stapler for his birthday! Post-its? Most. Exciting. Thing. Ever.

I can't tell you about my teacher gifts, simply because they read the blog and that would be a bummer. I will say that they are personalized. I do lots of little dollar-ish gifts during the Christmas season. Cello bags and ribbon and it looks like a million bucks. I found really large movie theater size boxes of Peppermint Bark this year in red an white striped boxes. Those are super cute with matching ribbon.

Coach Dabo at Clemson. I was very sad to see Coach Bowden go, but I am thrilled for the new coach and his family. I have always, and will always support all the Clemson coaches. It's important to remember that college athletes are 18-22 year old CHILDREN. You can't let your hopes and dreams ride on their performance in a game. Of course, my family's livelihood depends on college athletics, so I have a healthy respect for their efforts. However hard a coach works and teaches and trains and loves his players, when they take the field, it's up to them. Tailgate, support your school and the coaches!

My favorite Christmas gift. Hmmm, I really don't know. FishyBusyness and I exchange a box of stocking stuffers each year and that is super fun!

I think that's it, except the Hair Cycle, which requires more attention.

I am off to get my dress pressed for a Christmas Party tonight...I am solo as Coach is in Nash-vegas. Sigh.

Smooches.

84,000

That's about how many people are coming to the school event I am running tonight.



Tomorrow I am all yours, questions answered and Hair Cycle de-mythed.



Today? I am up to my elbows in Pasta and PTA.



See you tomorrow Scarlets.

^&*($#@@!!

I just brushed my teeth to head out to an Open House.

I leaned over the sink and spit toothpaste...directly into my hair.

Hair Cycle: Day 1.

With Fluoride.

I'll Make You a Deal

I'll post every single day to full hilarity.

I just need about 6 of you to buy or sell a house with me.

Easy enough. I am the most fun and hardest negotiating Realtor (yes, National Association of Realtors) you'll ever meet.

Sigh...

I am just over myself.

I've got nothing.

I'll answer questions...that's always an easy post. Ask away.

pout...sigh...pout...